Seven years is a long time to wait for something most people take for granted.
Seven years of pull-ups. Of therapy sessions dedicated entirely to one skill. Of setting timers, running reward charts, trying every strategy the occupational therapist recommended and a few I invented myself out of sheer desperation.
Seven years of quietly wondering if this would ever happen.
And then one morning — it did.
Aiden used the potty. Number two. On the bowl. Completely.
I ugly cried. I called people who would understand why this was a five-alarm celebration. I did a dance that no one will ever see footage of.
Here Is What the Data Tells Us.
Toilet training in autistic children is significantly more complex than in neurotypical peers. Sensory processing differences, communication barriers, and interoceptive awareness challenges — the ability to recognize internal body signals — all contribute to delays that can extend years beyond the typical developmental window. Research consistently shows that intensive, individualized behavioral approaches combined with occupational therapy support produce the best outcomes. And research also consistently shows that it takes as long as it takes.
There is no shortcut. There is no timeline to compare yourself to. There is only your child, your consistency, and the day that finally comes.
Ours came this week.
I wrote Aiden’s Kisses in the thick of those seven years. Not because everything was figured out. But because in the middle of all the hard — the appointments, the setbacks, the moments of pure exhaustion — Aiden was still Aiden. Still loving. Still joyful. Still showing up in his own beautiful way.
This book is for every child who loves differently. And for every parent who has spent years celebrating milestones the world does not notice.
Your breakthrough is coming. I promise.
Aiden’s Kisses is available now on Amazon.
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The Alani Jacob Foundation is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit building systems and resources for autistic individuals and their families.